A wonderful life – twice
Wow, it is a busy time! The blog has had to take a back seat. It isn’t that I don’t have things knocking around in my head that need to get out. It is just that I know how much time it would take to sit down and get it down on the keyboard. I never get around to it.
I am excited though. As I wrote in a tweet earlier today… “Wednesday… Thursday… ‘Ride-my-bike-day!’” Friday I should be able to ride my bike on the road again! It will be interesting to see what happens.
1) I have not exerted myself nearly to the point where I have in the past. Most of my trainer rides have been one hour spins. Recently they have had an average of 130 -140 watts with some efforts in there of 5 – 10 minutes at around 250 watts. The max wattage I’ve been hitting would be in the low 400′s. In other words, I’m starting to wonder if I might fall over on the side of the road if I attempt a ride of any distance.
2) Now that I am actually going to put the bike out on the road without the safety of my Cycleops trainer holding me up, I am starting to wonder how I’ll feel about that. Will I find that I’m nervous about staying upright? Will I freak out if I find myself in a tight spot? That would not be good. Confidence on the bike can be everything when it comes to handling.
3) What if I get out there and it is a big let down? I’ve been counting down the days for three months now. What if I get out there and the thought comes to my mind, “What did I ever find enjoyable about this?”
Friday morning I go in for more X-rays and I am 95% sure that Dr. Johnson is going to release me to be able to ride again. He will probably tell me that he doesn’t want me to race in a field where there would be a greater risk of crashing. However, I won’t be ready for that anyway.
My boss has given me the rest of the day off. My plan is to spend a good portion of that day out on my bike. I have no plans for a route. I think I will just go and explore some of my favorite places from my past times riding. Funny, even writing about it is somewhat emotional. The emotion doesn’t come because I will be back on my bike. It is there because of the realization that I was only a millimeter or so away from never being able to do those things again.
It is sobering… but liberating as well. The fact is, that didn’t happen. I refuse to live my life based on “what could have happened.” I have been given a wonderful life – twice. Everything from here is extra!
Stay tuned. I’m thinking of something interesting for Saturday, August 21. That is, if I get up the nerve!
Tags: Recovery
